Alistair Darling's Nigerian Scam

Dear British taxpayer

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude. I am Ministry of the Finance of the Kingdom of Great Britain.

My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 50 billion pounds UK. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you. I am working with Mr. Gordon Brown, First Minister, who tells me everything to do. You may remember he was Finance Minister for ten years during big expansion of UK banking and property market.
This transaction is 100% safe. This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank cheque. We need the funds as quickly as possible.We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance.

My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.Please reply with all of your bank account, NI number and ISA details and those of your children and grandchildren to Cityof londonbailout@treasury.gov.uk so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction.

After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully,
Minister Alistair Darling

(with acknowledgements to a similar letter sent by U.S. Treasury Secretary Paulson to American taxpayers for $800bn)